I'm Sorry

You'll never read this,

But I'm Sorry.

I'm sorry I started smoking again
I'm sorry I didn't quit the hundreds of times I said that I would.
I'm sorry I wasn't the perfect mother, or even near perfect.
I'm sorry I'm anxiety ridden and that I often let it get the best of me.
I'm sorry for being human.
I'm sorry that we made it to a place where we couldn't even hold a conversation without fighting.
I'm sorry you learned to hate me.
I'm sorry you learned to live without me.
I'm sorry I was never good with money.
I'm sorry I stopped trusting you.
I'm sorry I let you not marrying me being the focus of my anger.
I'm sorry for being so angry a majority of the time, and I'm sorry I couldn't find my way back from that place.
I'm sorry I wasn't able to get pregnant.
I'm sorry I wasn't able to be everything you wanted in a partner.
I'm sorry you didn't like my family.
I'm sorry that I didn't pick a degree you would be more proud of.
I'm sorry I was such a joke to you.
I'm sorry we didn't see eye to eye on politics.
I'm sorry I fought back when I should have just given in.
I'm sorry I got hurt.
I'm sorry I was out of work for so long.
I'm sorry I am so angry and cannot find a way to get past it.
I'm sorry I can't find a way to forgive you.
I'm sorry our friendship ended this way.
I'm sorry you're no longer part of my life.
I'm sorry you couldn't feel the overwhelming love that I carried for you.
I'm sorry for all the times you had to watch me cry.
I'm sorry we will never sit at the kitchen table drinking beers and laughing at facebook memes.
I'm sorry we will never sit next to each other trying to win at trivia.
I'm sorry I lost my best friend.
I'm sorry you didn't turn out to be the person I thought you would be.
I'm just sorry for everything.
I'm sorry for every tear that drips from my eyes.
I'm sorry, I am so very sorry.