Kandi Coated Thoughts on Tumblr

I don't feel like moving all of my poetry back over to this blog, so you can find it on my tumbler. Along with other poetry I've collected

Kandi Coated Thoughts on Tumblr

Fatal Attraction

Fatal Attraction

I have to get to her, I thought to myself, my head tucked inside my coat in an attempt to block the cold.  I was freezing; my hands were clenched inside my pockets as I walked briskly down the sidewalk. She was all I could think about.

 I’ll never forget the first time I saw her.  It was instant fatal attraction. I knew I would do anything to make her mine.  She was the most beautiful I had ever seen.  Looking at her was like watching the sunshine for the very first time and in that instant, all I had to know what it would feel like to slip inside her.

This memory kept me warm as I walked further down the street growing colder. The wind was picking up.  As I passed the bakery I saw two kids through the window sitting in the corner on their jackets, playing rock, paper, scissors.  Their mothers sitting in the chairs above them.  Probably gossiping.  Women are always gossiping.  They think their so damn flawless, but deep down inside their just as dirty and tainted as men. 

Except her.

She is flawless in every way.  Must get to her quickly, I thought, checking my watch. It’s been an hour. Longer than I had planned on being gone. I must get to her before someone finds her and tries to take her from me.

 I picked up my pace.  Just two more blocks to go. Down a flight of steps and behind the abandoned restaurant.  I shouldn’t have left her there, but I didn’t have a choice.  I couldn’t leave her out in the open.  She might just disappear.  

I started to lose the feeling in my fingers, so I thought about how smooth she felt the first time I touched her. It was exhilarating.  The faint sent of cherries on every breath.  The way her hard tiny knobs felt between my thick fingers as I gently twisted them.  The more I twisted, the louder she came alive, screaming out to me.

My friends laughed when I first told them about her, They said she was in a class of her own.  That I didn’t stand a chance.  I would never be able to get her, just working maintenance for the city. But I was determined to make her mine.  I knew I had to show them, and I did. 

 If they could only see the power I have over her. 

The control.

Who’s laughing now? 

If only my friends had been nice to me. I would have let them have a turn.  She could have handled all of us.  But not now.  They aren’t worthy.  I don’t need them anyway.  I have her and that’s more than enough.

Damn I am so cold.  The fifteen minute walk back from the bank seemed to be taking forever.  I should have skipped my appt.  I hate bankers; they’re always looking down on me like I’m trash. They think if you don’t have a big fancy house with a job clearing seven figures then you’re worth nothing at all.  Just like my damn friends, always looking down on me.

I think that’s my attraction to her.  I have the power in our relationship.  She never questions me.  She just does what I ask.  When I ask. 

Standing on the corner, waiting for the light to change, if felt like my crotch was going numb. I started hitting the button.  Come on Whammies! Whammies, Whammies Stop!

If only that worked, Of course there are No Whammy’s when it comes to traffic lights.  Just the pleasure of waiting, standing in the cold, listening to the idiots next to me going on about the 1999 European PGA tour.  Who gives a fuck about golf, it’s below freezing in the middle of January, and we’re in America, for God’s sake. 

As the light turned I hurried across the street. Just a bit further. I’ve been gone an hour and fifteen minutes, way longer than I had intended.  Damn bankers always taking their sweet time. I don’t even see the point in wearing this damn watch, it always seems like someone else is controlling my time anyways.

She had better still be there, If something has happened to her I don’t know what to do.

 The urge to be in her grows stronger with every step.  I just want to feel the heat penetrating from her body as I slip inside.

Approaching the abandoned restaurant, my pants tighten up.  Just knowing she’s down the steps and around the corner is turning me on. 

Man, after the day I’ve had, I’m really going to give it to her hard tonight.  I just have to find a safe place to go.  That new strip of road out by the airport should work.  There are no streetlights.  Plus the noise from the planes coming off the runway will drown out her screams, and add to the adrenaline rush.

I round the corner and I see her, my cock is throbbing as I approach the spot where I left her.   I never thought a yellow 2000 Ford Mustang could cause a fatal attraction.  After all, I’d always been a Chevy guy.

She doesn’t have any tickets, although the sign clearly states one hour parking.  I climb inside, breathing the sweet smell of cherry air freshener. Her soft leather interior is still warm.  I turn the key and hear her moan as the engine started up, turning her radio knob gently, Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls begins.  The perfect song, for my perfect girl.

~KKirk

I Lied.

I want for nothing I said, but I lied.
I want to feel love, and hear laughter, and feel electricity at the hand of another.
I want for nothing I said, but I lied.
I want to be heard, understood.
I want for nothing I said, but I lied.

~Kandi

Fireflies

It was a warm night in June.  The air was starting to chill and the woods were beginning to darken.  I was meeting Carmen; she was tall and elegant with hair the color of flames. 

   We met halfway between here and there, at the crossroads in the center of the woods, there was no one around.  Benches lined an incline close to the road; trees blocked the traffic making the area surrounding us seem like nowhere.  We had gone into the woods to get high and look at Fire Flies.  We lit our joints and waited. 

​After our third drag, We spotted a Firefly  then came another and another one. This wasn't enough for us, we were there to experience nature, we needed more. 

     Carmen and I wanted to see the sky light up, like stars in an empty field.  We decided that the only way to make this possible was singing to the fire flies.  We thought maybe if we asked them to appear, they would reveal a light so special that the two people earning so much to see them, would stare in disbelief.  We started singing, and we sang whatever came to mind. We spoke to the Fireflies, letting them know how beautiful they were and how lucky we felt to be exposed to their light.  We beckoned the Fireflies upon us, hoping we would have the pleasure of seeing them shine.  The trees gradually began to fill with light; we stood up and turned in circles watching the Fireflies swooping in around us; They were beautiful.  

     We sat down on the benches to smoke the rest of our joints and to view the rest of our private showing. A Firefly flew up to me,  and I thanked him, for showing himself to us, and thanked him for being so beautiful.   

    We had spoken to  them and they had answered.  Carmen and I thanked the powers that be that night.  We showed gratitude for the  sweet grass we inhaled,  for the warm spring night on the brink of Summer, and we thanked them for their beautiful creation of Fireflies.   Natures way of lighting mimicking the night sky.  The Fireflies lit our way through the woods.  They showed us the way home, and they disappeared. 

​Weeks later Carmen and I returned with friends, determined to recreate that spectacular night.  There were five of us,  But the fireflies didn’t show.  Carmen and I knew we were special, the fireflies had chosen us and we were able to experience that moment that would stay with us for a lifetime.

~Kandi Kirk

Illusions

It’s all an Illusion.

Trixie makes her way down the dark hallway the humidity; makes breathing difficult.  The screams of her friends echo through the surrounding walls. She is startled by her distorted reflection multiplied in shadows down the wall.  Instinctively she makes a sharp left as she attempts to recall the lay out of the building in her mind. 

The once familiar maze has her confused.  The darkness and smoke have created a parallel universe.  Do I go left or right she thinks to herself. Right. I’ll go right. That should lead down to the next hallway.

Stepping to the right, the floor gives out below her and she begins to fall. It's only an illusion she tells herself. The heat inside the building is overwhelming and she can feel the panic set in as the oxygen is slowly sucked out of the air. Count to ten she thinks.  Count slowly to ten then breathe. 

The walls begin to quickly close in. 

This is a nightmare.  I’m going to die inside my very own nightmare.  But it’s just an illusion.  It’s all an illusion. No! Panicking she screams, I have to get out of here. 

She begins to run, crossing the rickety bridge she slips, her hand getting tangled in the rope as her body hits the hard uneven wood below.  Her wrist snaps in a horrifying sound of bone snapping as an unsettling pain shoots through her left arm. 

I an attempt to untangle herself her body falls halfway into the water below the bridge and she finds herself half tangled in the rope and half tangled with a human body floating in the water.  Terrified she jerks her body to get away, pulling tighter on the rope and causing even more pain in her already mangled hand.

Soaked through to her skin the moisture starts to rise off her body in a deep humidity making it even more difficult to breathe.  She begins to suffocate, and reminds herself again to breathe.

If I can just stay calm, I will find my way out of here, I just have to remember this is all an illusion.

I have to go.  I have to get up and get out of here or I’m not going to make it.

Although the screams are becoming more distant, she can still hear them echoing through the walls around her.

A mixture of pain and terror set in causing adrenaline to go rushing through her body.  In one bold move she is off.  Bolting down the hallways.  She makes her way through the maze like structure with ease as though in that moment she could clearly recall every inch of the floor plan.  Then the realization hits. She’s made a wrong and possibly fatal turn. She continues to move forward acknowledging that the floor has given way to tracks, and she can feel the rocks shifting beneath her feet. 

The whistle from the train cuts sharply across the air as its one headlight shining brightly down the dark tunnel blinds her.  She screams and as the train passes through her, her entire body goes limp.  

She can see the dark smoke starting to circulate through the dark tunnel; laying mangled on the tracks she picks up her body with her one good arm, heaving for air.  Smoke fills her lungs as she begins to cough and then instantly falls limp.

I refuse to give up she thinks to herself, I will not die like this.  There should be an emergency exit just a little further up the tunnel.

She pulls her broken body off the ground and slowly limps towards the exit.  Her limp body gives way to a quick walk and before she even realizes it, she’s running again at full speed.  Acknowledging the flickering red light above the door she hits the door without slowing down, and without hitting the handle to let her out, crushing her already broken hand against the burning metal door.  As she pushes on the metal lever she feels blisters bubbling on her skin. As she walks through the emergency exit she find herself trapped in a wall of flames.

Her flesh starts to burn, blisters form on the surface of her skin as she struggles to find the door. Gaining her balance she uses all her weight to push through the second door.  She steps into a room surrounded by mirrors, she feels the cold water from the sprinkler system extinguishing the flames, and as the shock begins to set in, her charred reflection stares back at her from the mirror.  Her blistered lips look oddly familiar as they mouth; this is all an illusion.   The salt from her tears burns at her face as she pushes desperately at the mirrors searching for the one that will give way to the outside.  

As she stumbles out of the funhouse, a wave of oxygen washes over her, The humid 90 degree air is oddly cool against the burns festering on her body.  The spotlights from the police cars are blinding as she begins to walk towards them.  There is so much noise but she can’t make out what anyone is saying.  She feels a searing pain tear through her chest.  Looking down she sees the blood pouring out of her.  A familiar face runs towards her out of the crowd as she Collapses.  Gasping for air she reminds herself, this is all an illusion.  Her body deflates as the familiar face screams out from the crowd. 

It’s not her.  She works here.  IT WASN’T HER! 

Paying no attention the police surround her body as the fireman moves in to extinguish what’s left of the flames.  After the fire has succeeded, the remains of the arsonist are found trapped inside the rotating room.

~Kandi Kirk

Miniature Golf

​It was a hot Saturday afternoon, James dressed in his typical ripped up jeans, and red t-shirt, with black vans.  He was out on the miniature golf course giving lessons.  

​It's all about the length of your club says James, you have to be able to swing it just right or your ball wont get where your aiming.  

​Stepping out onto the first hole, James notices a hottie in a tight white shirt, and short green skirt, that chick couldn't be more than 14.  Just the way I like em' old enough to lie to her parents, but still stupid enough to sleep with me.  

​Dan says uhm yeah sure she's pretty hot.  It takes Dan 7 tries to nail the ball in on the first hole, and of course James nails it in the first time, only adding to his already swelling ego.  

​They move onto the second hole and James being cocky, drives the putter as hard as he can sending the blue golf ball flying in the air, over the hole where it ricochets  off the number 3 post, flies back and pops him right in the mouth, knocking his front tooth loose, he can taste the blood in his mouth.   Jesus says Dan, you alright? I'm just fine says James just wanted to show you what can happen if you don't control your ball carefully.  James notices the little hottie giggling from 2 holes away, she turns away as soon as he spots her.  Dan steps up swings and nails it in on the first try.  Huh says James, thats just beginners luck.  Nobody gets a hole in one on this course.

​With a bruised ego and a mouth full of blood, James moves Dan onto hole number three.  He notices that the hotties family is holding her up and is hoping they can get through the next two holes quickly enough so they end up directly behind them.  Dan swings first tripping up his putter on the ground.  James just laughs, I told you it's all about the length of your putter, if it's to short you'll never get down there and if it's too long you'll spend all day tripping over it and never hit where your aiming.  Finally three tries later Dan sinks it in, it takes James 2 tries and the hole is complete.  This is pretty fun says Dan, do you do this a lot.  I am a professional says James, the best this course has ever seen, I am unbeatable.

​Moving up to hole number Four James fails to notice his shoe is untied and he trips knocking himself slightly unconscious on a rock the size of a remote control truck.  Dan reaches down to grab his hand, my god you have to be careful that's the second injury you've sustained and we are only on hole number Four.  I'm telling you Dan, says James, the golf course is a dangerous place, and only a real man can stand the challenges of a course like this.

James nails the ball in on the first try, getting a little better Dan nails it on try number two, and they move on.

​Realizing the 14 year old is now just a hole a head of them, James tries to step up his game just a bit.  This hole here he tells Dan, is like a mountain range, you want to climax it to the very top before bringing it down on the other side, you've got to do it slowly and gently and put just a little extra behind it, otherwise the ball will just keep coming back every time.  James steps up swings perfectly as the ball slides in on a hole in one.  Dan over swings missing the hole completely and ends up digging his ball out of the rock foundation two holes over.  Boy!  You’re going to kill someone with a swing like that says James, Dan tries 5 more times frustrated because he just can't get the ball into the hole.  I'm over this hole says Dan, lets just move on.  Sooth your temper Dan it's all about getting the ball in the hole, no one is perfect there first go around, practice makes perfect if you don't practice and you don't get any better then you'll never be anything but just plane screwed.

​Moving on to hole six James is eyeing his little hottie as she bends over to pick up her pink ball.  They are just one hole ahead of us, if we lay this one out on the first try we can stand right behind her without looking suspicious.  With that said, Dan steps up swings and nails a hole in one.  Nice job Dan, I always have a hard time on this one.  James swings as the ball rolls up the hill and down missing the hole by less than an inch.  One handed he takes the club and taps it in.  Bending down to pick up the balls, James hears a rip.  Wouldn't you know it there goes my jeans, yep says Dan, ain't nothing left on your behind but a bunch of squirrels playing on your boxer shorts.  Damnit I did not need this today, Fucking July it's a hundred degrees outside, I'm sweating, toothless, and now I have no back to my pants.  Well considering part of the front was already missing says Dan; I would say it's time for some new pants.

​They move up to hole seven where the hottie and her family are finishing up their game.  They seem to all be bickering about something, but with all the voices going at once its hard to hear what’s being said. 

​ You want to play through?  Excuse me says James, I said do you want to play through to the next hole?  No that’s OK we'll just wait.  The family goes back to arguing as James and Dan stand back and check out the daughter.   As she bends over to pick up her pink ball again, James notices she's not wearing any panties under her shorts.  Hey Dan check it out, now that’s what I would call a hole in one.  Knock it off James she's not even legal.  Thats right up there with sleeping with a cousin or something.  Wait a second Dan, my cousin is pretty hot and well it doesn't matter, as long as the parents think it's OK, its fine by me.

​The family moves onto the final hole, while James and Dan step up to Hole seven.  The object of this hole here, is to hit the ball hard enough to get it through not only the first pipe but from the first pipe to the back hole without getting the ball wet by having it fly into the stream.  This one seems to be more of a challenge and although Dan can get the ball through the first pipe, it just doesn't want to go in the back hole.  It keeps rolling around the hole and bouncing out, but just wont sink in.  You’re pushing to hard Dan, just loosen up and ease it in nice and slow.  Perfect.  James goes next nails it in three shots, and they take their place in line behind the hottie and her family.

​As they are waiting on hole 8 to open up, James notices the hottie having trouble with her swing.  At the same time he notices this, her father notices him staring at his little girls ass.  James walks up and offers to help with her stance, as he goes to slide his hands down her smooth thighs, her back swing nails him right in the face at the same time her dad clubs him from behind. 

​ Uncle Rick he's been making comments about Stephanie all day you shouldn't let your daughter walk around in such skimpy clothes. 

​Oh yeah Dan, well you shouldn't let people talk smack about your cousin like that.  What are you going to do when you two get married, just let guys drool all over her all day?  

​What was I suppose to do, the guy was teaching me how to golf, practice makes perfect you know, and I'm worried about the size of my club I just don't think my game is going to be adequate enough for Stephanie.  

​As James starts moaning and coming through Stephanie kicks him in the mouth, knocking out two more teeth.  

​Jesus lord girl your gonna kill the man right here in plain sight, Help me move him of the course Dan.   

​Dan and Rick drag James's body over to the bridge, laying him face first in a foot and half of bright blue water. 

​ Now come on Son let's play through, and for god sakes Stephanie next time you go out in public put some underwear on...............

11:00 pm Saturday night local news.  A 27 year old man was found face down in a foot of water underneath a bridge on a miniature golf course, the apparent victim of an accident.  It seems the man was playing golf when he tripped over his shoe lace slipped on the wet sidewalk, knocking out his front teeth and managing to land face first in the water under the bridge.   The police on scene said that he had apparently tried to get up at some point but slammed his head into the bottom of the bridge knocking himself unconscious.  Apparently at sometime during this tragic accident he managed to rip his pants and due to the color of the water when we found his cold stiff body, it was bluer than usual and the only thing completely noticeable was the squirrels playing on his boxer shorts.  What a shame said the police officer, he was only on the 8th hole, he never even had the chance to play through.

~Kandi Kirk

Love is in the air

Love Is In The Air

Sitting in the passenger seat of the car, 8 years old in the parking garage of the airport, about to make the scariest trip of my life.   Dad had to work this morning so it’s just mom and me. It feels like a dungeon in the parking garage, cars lighting up like fire breathing dragons.  There really isn’t too many people around, for an airport that is.  I’m fiddling with the window button on the door trying to think up a good excuse not to go.  The window goes up and everything is silent, window goes down and it sounds like a vacuum cleaner is going to suck you out of the car.  Finally I get the courage to look over at my mom and tell her the truth.   “Mom, I’m scared.  I don’t want to get on the plane.  I just want to stay home for the summer.”

​“Elizabeth, sweet heart you’ll be fine.  I this all seems scary now but it will work itself out, trust me.  Lizzie I was scared the first time I got on a plane, but you want to know a secret?”

​“Sure!”

“My first airplane trip turned out to be one of the best experiences ever. You just talked to your grandparents last night, and they are so excited to see you.  Just think of how much fun your going to have in Minnesota.  You’ll get to see your cousins and all your aunts and uncles, and don’t forget about Lacy.  You guys always have a good time when you’re together.”  

​She’s got me there, and I would have fun but I would have lots more fun if I was going by train, or by car.  I think riding an elephant to Minnesota would be more fun than getting on an airplane, besides you never hear anything about people hijacking elephants.  And mom has never been scared, so why is she admitting it now?   “Mom, you were scared?” 

“Yes, I was scared.  Have a never told you about my first time on an airplane?”

“Obviously not mom!” 

Turning the engine off, mom turns in her seat to look at me; she has this look in her eye like I’m going to get lectured for something.  She hit the child lock switch on the windows so now I was being forced to play with the Vanilla Air freshener on the dashboard, anything to distract me from this.

“Well, I was about your age.  It was right after my third grade year and Grandpa and Grandma had decided to go on a second honeymoon to Europe for the summer.  We were living in Rochester at the time and I was flying to Atlanta to spend the summer with my Great Aunt Betty and her husband Roger.  I was just as scared as you are now, and my mom and dad took me by the hands and led me through the airport and down the terminal.  I had a brand new pink backpack and mom had just bought me the book Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing by Judy Blume, so I would have something to read on the plane.  Dad gave me a sketchbook and a new set of markers.”  

“Hey now I didn’t get anything fancy for agreeing to this, you guys owe me.  In fact I’m not getting on the plane until I collect on my debt.”

“They have a books story in the airport Elizabeth that can be arranged.”

“aaah, she got me again.”

“Anyways, when we got to the gate, we walked up to the counter, which was so tall I couldn’t see over the top of it.  I heard my parents tell the lady at the counter who I was and I heard a voice come over the loud speaker, ‘We need an escort for a child at gate A2.  We need an escort for a child at gate A2.  Thank you.’  A few minutes later a very pretty young girl with big green eyes and dark hair tied up in a knot, wearing a blue stewardess outfit came up and greeted me, she told me her name was Lexi, which was short for Alexis.”

​“Mom and Dad kissed me good-bye, and passed me off to Lexi who took me by the hand, and led me down a very long, very cold tunnel, which eventually led to the belly of the airplane.”

“So Grandma and Grandpa just handed you off to a complete stranger, just like that and watched her take you into a tunnel?  Are they crazy, she could have kidnapped you.”

“Stop being so dramatic Elizabeth.  To finish the story, Lexi told me that she would be my flight stewardess and that I could sit in the front row by her and that if I needed anything at all, all I had to do was ask.  I sat down in my seat, next to the window.  It was uncomfortable because I was in the front row, and there was a wall in front of me, so I had nowhere to put my feet.  Lexi helped get me buckled in.  She then had me take what I needed out of my backpack, before she put it in a drawer above my head.

​“Looking out across the tar Mack I could see my parents waving from the window of the airport.”

“what is a tar Mack mom?:

“The tar Mack honey is the big parking lot they use to park the airplanes on when they loading and unloading.”  

“Mom I’m still scared and this story isn’t helping.”

“Well let me finish, I was so scared that I started to cry.  Since they hadn’t begun loading passengers yet Lexi and I were the only ones on the airplane.  Lexi sat down next to me and asked me why I was crying.   I told her exactly what your telling me now; that I was scared and that I didn’t want to be on an airplane because I was afraid something bad was going to happen.  Then Lexi told me about the first time she had ever gotten on an airplane.”

​“She was 7 years old, and had just finished the second grade and her parents were separated and living in different states.  She lived with her mother and was on her way to see her dad for the summer.  Since she and her mother lived in Minnesota and her Father lived in Florida.  She had been really scared getting on the plane for the first time.  The flight stewardess had been an older lady who didn’t smile and hardly talked at all.  She reminded her of the wicked witch of the East from the Wizard of  OZ.  She had a long pointed noise and wore her graying here in a very tight bun, and apparently the women hated bunny rabbits because she kidnapped Lexi’s bunny rabbit and stuck him in the cabinet above above her head.  She told her that the rabbit was distracting to the other passengers.  She just glared at Lexi and told her to behave herself.  Lexi had thought it was the worst thing that could ever happen to her.  

“The first part of the flight, she flew from Rochester to Minneapolis.  When she got there, she got off the plane, and rode on a small cart with the mean flight stewardess.”

“Why didn’t they just take her broom stick?”

“Elizabeth!”

“Anyways It’s about that time sweetie we should start heading inside.”  

“I had lost the battle my mother the women who was suppose to love me and care for me and protect me from danger, was going to make me get on an airplane.  It was almost to much to bear.”

“Walking through the parking garage was not helping my fears, it was so dark, there were few people, but it felt like at any second a monster was going to jump out and eat you alive.  Good thing mom parked close and we didn’t have far to walk.  driven by a man in a jumpsuit.  Stepping through the sliding glass doors was like entering another planet that smelled like pine sol, there were people everywhere.  I was barely in the door and here comes a man driving a little car just like my mom had described.”

“Ok Mom when you’re ready, finish your story.”

“The man on the cart drove them all the way to the other side of the airport, where the flight stewardess introduced her to another stewardess, and took Lexi by the hand, and led her down to another airplane, which would take her to Florida.”

They passed her on to the next person like a piece of luggage,.  All she had to keep her company was a pink bunny rabbit, which seemed to be annoying everyone.  When she got onto the next plane, the flight stewardess led her to her seat.  Sitting in the seat next to hers, was the cutest boy she had ever seen.  He had the blondest hair and the bluest eyes, and when he smiled at her, he said, “Hi!” 

“Lexi said he was the most beautiful boy she had every seen, his name was Nicholas.”

​“Lexis sat down and started talking to Nicholas and she found out that he had almost the exact experience she did flying into Minneapolis from Sioux Falls.”

”Nicholas thought all the grown ups were mean, and that he too was worried that the plane was going to crash, even though he’d been on planes before and none of them had crashed.”

“What do you mean the plane would crash?  I thought 911 was just a bad misfortune are you telling me this happens all the time!  I can’t be in a plane crash, I don’t even know Algebra yet!”

“Elizabeth!  Calm down the plane is not going to crash, and you need to stop yelling because you’re freaking all of these people out.”

“Nicholas said that all he wanted to do was turn around and go home.  He said, ‘This place is like a prison.  If you even squirm an inch, they’ll come running to tie you into your chair.  At least on my last airplane trip I got to meet the pilots and they gave me these cool little wings and everything.  This time they wont even talk to me. I asked for wings and they told me to just sit down and behave.’”

​“Well, it turned out that Nicholas lived with his mom too, and that his dad also lived in Florida.  When Lexi and Nicholas got to Florida, they found another coincidence; their dads happened to live in the same apartment building.  They both laughed becausethe apartment building was painted the color of the ocean and had a mural of a blue marlin painted on the side.  They embraced this coincidence because this way they didn’t feel so alone.  So as it turns out this was the first of many summer adventures for Lexi and Nicholas.  

“Once their parents realized what good friends they had become, they started booking all of their summer flights together, and every other Christmas.  It put the two kids at ease, because they were no longer alone.  

“They spent the next 10 years making the trip together. When they were twelve, their plane experienced an electrical malfunction and the ended up on a five-hour layover in Atlanta.  The flight attendants had taken them to the employee lounge area, where they could relax.  When no one was looking they escaped from the lounge, and Nicholas stole one of the commuter carts.  They went tearing through the airport.  When security caught up with them, they were so mad, they contacted their parents and got permission to handcuff them to their chairs.  It was complete torture.  They ended up watching the entire Miss America Pageant, because no one would change the channel for them.”

“Who were they rooting for mom?”  

“I have no idea Elizabeth, that’s not the point of the story.”

“I was just trying to make it a little more interesting.”

“Mom kept talking and talking and talking, and all I could do was look around at everything around me, they had gift shops of every kind and restaurants, little chairs with TV’s attached for people watch television, secret doors that said VIP’s only.  I had always considered myself to be rather important but for some reason I didn’t think they would let me in, if I could get away for 5 second I would definitely try, I bet I could convince them to let me in.”

​“The older they got, the less people paid attention to them.  When they were thirteen, Nicholas gave Lexi her first kiss on a flight between Minneapolis and Chicago.  When they were fifteen, they were flying to Florida to spend Christmas with their parents when a blizzard hit, and they ended up stranded in Minneapolis.  Which was a funny coincidence, since neither of them lived far from there, and Minneapolis was their first connection.  

“So there they were, two fifteen-year-olds, stuck in the Minneapolis airport during a blizzard.  They called Lexis’s mom who booked them a room at a local motel, and then called Nicholas’s mom to let her know what was going on. They took a cab to the motel, and spent three days together.”

“Did they have sex, in the movies they always have sex.”

“ELIZABETH!  Apparently I’m having the wrong conversation with you.”

“Mom, I’m eight. I watch movies.  I know about that stuff.”

“Apparently you watch to many movies, and I have been doing a poor job of monitoring what you’ve been watching.”

“Moving on!  When they were seventeen, they thought it would be fun to take a little mini vacation.  They decided they would sneak onto the wrong plane, and took a flight to NY instead of Orlando,

​“When I asked Lexi whatever happened to Nicholas, she said Come with me.’  She led me up the aisle, to the cockpit, and introduced me to the Pilot.  Lexi said, ‘Amanda, I’d like you to meet Nicholas.’  And there he was, sitting in the pilot’s chair, in his dark blue suit and cap.  He was so handsome. 

​“I said, ‘Wow, you guys work together?  Are you married too?’  Sure enough, they’d been married for four years.  It was like a fairy tale!  That’s when I heard giggling and looked over and saw the cutest boy I have ever seen standing in the doorway of the plane.  He had big green eyes, and strawberry blonde hair…”  

​Elizabeth said, “Was it Daddy, Mommy?”

​“Yes, Elizabeth, it was your Daddy.”

​“So that’s how you met him!”

​“Yes.  So see, some of the scariest experiences can turn out to have the happiest endings.  Life is just full of unexpected surprises.  So what do you say, are we ready to get on that plane?”

​Elizabeth smiled and said, “No.” 

“Well we have to go through security now, so behave.”

“Once inside, security gave mom a special pass to get through the security check.  Iwatched intently as the security guard opened My suitcase and searched everything inside , before closing it again.  Then we walked to the security checkpoint, where we had to stand in line for twenty minutes.  Then and Then the security lady asked me to remove my shoes!”

​. “Mom, I don’t think that Lexi and Nicholas would have such a good time now-a-days. Well with all the security issues.”

​Amanda laughed. “You’re probably right, hun.”

​“ We kept walking, this place seemed like a never ending amusement park, finally we reached where we were suppose to be going.”

​”Mom walked up to the counter and informed the lady that I would be flying alone, I heard her call out over the loudspeaker.”

“We need an escort for a child at gate C3.  Repeat, we need an escort for a child at gate C3, thank you.” 

​“I looked at my mom, she was so beautiful and looked very young for her age and I always thought she looked trust worthy, so maybe she was right about this whole flying thing.  Mom, Did you ever see Lexi and Nicholas again?”

“No, I never saw them again, but I’m sure they lived happily ever after.  They really were the cutest couple you could ever imagine.”

​Elizabeth smiled. “Even cuter than you and Daddy?”

​Amanda laughed. “Well, I don’t know about that…”

​They walked over to the gate, and a beautiful woman walked up to them with big green eyes, with her dark hair tied back in a knot.  She was wearing a blue stewardessoutfit, and said, “Hi!  I’m Alex.  I’m here to take you…”

​Elizabeth was so excited that she practically screamed, “Mom!  Look!  Her name is Alexis!”

“I looked up at mom and her face looked like a radish she was covering her eyes like she does when I’ve does something completely embarrassing.”

“I’m so sorry, I was just telling my daughter the story of my first time on an airplane, and about a flight attendant named Lexi, and her husband Nichol…”  Amanda stopped, as she realized how much Alex reminded her of Lexi.”

​“Well, if you mean Lexi and Nicholas Nelson, who used to work for Northwest Airlines, they would be my parents. Said Alex.”

​“You’ve got to be kidding me, all of these years and I have always wondered what happened to them, they were the nicest couple I had ever met.”

​  “It’s amazing how many people’s lives my parents touched with the story of how they fell in love.  It’s really quite amazing.  It’s almost like having a celebrity for a parent!”

​ “I can’t believe it’s all true Mom!  I thought you made it all up!  Do they still work here?  Can I meet them?  Can I?”

​Amanda shook her head.“I’m really sorry, this is all just such a coincidence.”

​“It’s fine said Alex, I don’t mind at all.”

​Amanda nodded. “Well, then would you mind if I asked what became of them?  I’ve been wanting to know for over twenty years.”

​Alex smiled softly. “After I was born they both retired from Northwest Airlines and started their own charter company.   Some important people would commission my parents to fly them between meetings and social events and things of that nature.  Four years ago, there was a terrible blizzard in Minneapolis and they had to cancel a flight.  I’m sure you’ve heard the story of them being stuck in a blizzard in Minneapolis.  Well they thought this would be a good time to relive that memory, and they booked a room at that very same motel that they had stayed at so many years before.  My father, Nicholas, called a cab to take them to the hotel and on the way there, the cab hit a patch of ice skidded off of the Passover Bridge and landed in the middle of 494.  It caused a massive pile up.  Eight people died that night, including my father and my mother.”  

​“As I looked up at my mom again, I could see that she was starting to cry, tears were slowly slipping down her face, I grapped her and I hugged her as she continued to talk to Alex.”

“That is so horrible I am so sorry, I didn’t mean…” 

Alex cut her off with a wave of her hand. “No, no.  It’s fine.  My parents were quite well known and people ask me about them all the time.”  

A voice came over the loudspeaker, saying it was time to board the flight.  Amanda got down on one knee again and said, “Ok Elizabeth are you ready to board the plane?”  

Elizabeth looked up at Alex’s green eyes, and then back to her mom. “I suppose, Mom. Do I really have to go?”  

“Yes sweetie you really have to go.  Don’t worry you will be home in no time.  Now go enjoy your summer.”  

“I through my arms around my mom and kissed her on the cheek, she told me she loved and let me go, I grabbed Alex’s hand and started down the long tunnel.”

“Hey, guess what, Elizabeth said Alex.”

​“I don’t know, what?”

​“It just so happens that I met this really cut boy about your age earlier.  His name is James.”

​“Really?  Where was he going?”

​“Same place you are.”  As Elizabeth stepped onto the plane, she locked eyes with the cutest boy she had ever seen.  He had sandy brown hair, and beautiful hazel eyes.  It was love at first site.​

Vegetation

When I was young, I looked like every other seed in the bag, small, awkward, even a bit unattractive, I was chosen above all the rest.  He saw something in me that even I could not see in myself, potential. 

As time went on I blossomed, my outer layers forming, first from a hard leathery green, and then eventually to a beautiful shade of read that was smooth as silk to the touch.  I sat atop my beautifully leafy pedestal with the sun glistening down on my delicious skin, and I was the most beautiful specimen ever to grace this wondrous garden. The carrots stood next to me stiff with envy, while the onions wept over my untouchable beauty.  The radishes grew red with rage at the very thought of my beautiful shade, as they new nothing could compare with my beautiful skin.

When he approached us on this day, everyone became quiet with anticipation, but it came as no surprise when it was I he picked over everyone else.  I was proud, and I experienced a joy unlike anything else I had felt in my life, and in the next moment, I felt myself starting to die. He carried me from the garden into his home and after washing me with harsh water, he gave me a new place to rest upon a stiff paper towel in the window above his sink. 

At this point I was feeling betrayed, and I did not know what would come next.  I had heard talks of people disappearing from the garden never to return, and I figured this must be the part of the journey no one has ever lived to tell about.  I was going to die, and the only questions left were how and when. Maybe he will make it quick and painless, maybe this spot is only temporary, or maybe he will leave me sitting on the window sill for a few days pondering what will happen next, wondering where my destiny will take me.  

It seemed like days had gone by but since the sun had only set and not risen again, I knew that it had only been hours.  The man approached me again, and gently lifted me off the windowsill.  He then placed me on my side against a cold block of wood, and while is gently restrained me with one hand, in the other he picked up a long shiny object.  I felt the cold blade touch my soft skin, and then sink deeply into me, the process was quick as he lifted the weapon and lowered into me again,  I could feel my juices starting to flow out of my body, and my once round figure had been diminished into small thin slices.  

As I lay there dying, I knew that this is what I had lived for.  It was not beauty to bring happiness to ones eye, or a lovely scent to tickle the nose, it was sustence. I lived so that one day, this man whom I had befriende and trusted, could enjoy my death.  And I new that I was not the last, but like those who had gone before me, it was too late to go back and warn those that will follow.  My fate had been sealed.

~Kandi Kirk

White

"White dress, white light, Hills like white elephants. White roses, why?"
why, what?
"Why the roses?, we've been together 5 years. The only time
you' ve bought roses is on our first date." "now here you are with your big romantic gesture, waving them in my face like
you've finally surrendered."
I have surrendered, and I'm sorry. should I paint them red? You always did love a good fairytale.
"yes, but white is much more fitiing, don't you think? it screams death, love, confusion. All those things I feel in this
very moment."
would you like something to drink? the waitress asks as she hands them both menus.
"White wine."
I'll have a beer please. How are you feeling?, he asks leaning towards her. taker her cold hands in his.
"Like my souls been removed, and I' m being punished for not caring enough."
I'm sorry, he said.
"It was my choice. My inconvenience."
I was thinking, maybe we could take a drive into the mountains this weekend. The leaves are at there peak, I know how much you love Fall. We could stop at a pumpkin patch, or try one of those haunted trails you've been wanting to check out. It will be a good distraction.
"Death a distraction?, are you trying to be ironic?"
The waitress sets down their drinks and asks if they're ready to order.
"I'll have the chicken bacon white BBQ sandwich with chips.
And for you sir? she asked.
I' ll have the burger, medium rare with fries.
"The beach. Cold solitude, it will be deserted this time of year. Everyone will have moved on, closed up for the season. i could use the taste of salt in the air. The vastness of the water. I want to be lost in something bigger than myself. A blanket, a good book, a baggy sweater, a bottle of wine, and you."

white?
"White what?"
Wine? On the beach.
"No, I think it should be red, I need to forget those blinding lights. The cold room. The stranger reaching places only you have been, it was horrible. I'm horrible."
You are not horrible, I love you. You have a strength inside you that is unbelievable. You are beautiful, and we will get past this. There is a future, and in it is forgiveness, for both of us."
The waitress brings them there food.
"When did you become a fortuneteller?"
what do you mean?
"you said the future held forgiveness, how do you know?"
It is not as much of a know, as it is a need. There can't be eternal damnation for our decision. It was the right thing for both of us, and I can't think of what would have been, who would have been, I can only think of the moment in time when we both feel forgiveness. I need to believe that time exists.
"I'm nautious, they said this could happen." do you want to go?  I can ask for a box.
"No, finish your food. I'll eat later. You need your strengtn, you're taking care of me tonight." she laughed,
I am? He said.
"Yes, you, a box of chocolates, and some white zinfandel." I can handle that, I love you.
"I love you too." 

as they get up to leave he puts her coat on and wraps his arm around her. walking out, it starts to snow.
"snow, in October. How fitting " she said meakly, " How perfectly fitiing." 

Happiness

I think drug abusers choose to do drugs on the playground; because it's the last place they remember leaving their happiness. ~Kandi

Climb the highest peak.

When you look past those things you use to define other people, that you use to define yourself.

When you search beyond the physical, beyond the mental, when you throw away what you consider to be flaws.

You uncover a soul.  
A soul that has survived the worst life has to offer, the deepest of loss.  The darkest of pain.

A soul that has turned around and climb to the highest peak; with the greatest of love, the brightest of sunshine, and begged for only the slightest of breath to survive. 
A soul that can show you that the shell of who we are on the outside, can never define the person we have chosen to become on the inside.  It is merely a shell protecting us from the rest of the world and their inability to understand.    ~Kandi

Sucked Dry

Sucking me dry.

Lashing out with your tongue; taking me down layer by layer.

Eager to reach the hidden prize inside.

Impatiently you bite through.
In the middle is not what you expected.
Corrosion.

Ugliness.

You leave me exposed.
Shattered and sticky.
The unpleasantness of my insides hanging out.

My sweetness.
Flavor.
My tough exterior gone forever.

I am ruined.  
~Kandi